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Why I Will: Three Mothers Explain

December 17, 2020
Having children is often the driving force for people to finally start writing their Will. We spoke to three Canadian moms who recently created their own Wills with Epilogue to chat about their experiences.
Written By Sydney CowieDecember 17, 2020

We’ve heard it before and we’ll hear it again:

“I knew I needed to make my Will when I had my first child, but I didn’t have the time.”

There’s no arguing that starting a family is a juggling act. As soon as the new baby comes home, writing your Will quickly falls to the bottom of the to-do list.

This is one of the main reasons why Epilogue came to be. The co-founders, Daniel Goldgut and Arin Klug, aren’t just lawyers, they’re also parents. As they entered the parenting chapter of their lives, so did their friends. They saw it happen time and time again: new parents admitting they should have a Will, but lacking the time or expertise to get started.

Since launching in March 2020, we’ve jumped at every opportunity to help young families find peace of mind by protecting their new bundle of joy. Take it from Nikki, Karishma, and Jessica—three Canadian moms who’ve used Epilogue to create their Wills and start important conversations with their loved ones.

Let’s meet the moms!

Nikki is a full-time blogger and new mom to her beautiful daughter:

Karishma is a Public Health Nurse with two little ones:

Jessica is a stay at home momma to three kiddos:

Being a parent is a full-time gig.

As it turns out, raising children is very time-consuming! Parents struggle to get a moment alone with their thoughts, let alone an afternoon to visit a lawyer’s office. It’s no surprise that time is one of the biggest barriers for new parents. Lack of time alongside hefty lawyer fees is a recipe for procrastination. While putting off spending a large sum of money can sometimes be beneficial, when it comes to protecting your loved ones with a Will, procrastination is not the way.

Before Epilogue, what was stopping you from getting your Will done?

Nikki: “We are brand new parents. Mila is only 9 months old. We knew creating our Wills was a priority but we’ve been in the newborn baby craziness and couldn’t find the time.”

Karishma: “The time it took to visit a lawyer’s office and the heavy fees.”

Jessica: “The inconvenience of finding sitters to watch our children while we went to an appointment!”

Important conversations are often the hardest to have

Estate planning is not a common topic in many households. If your parents didn’t talk to you about their Will, it’s hard to know where to start with your own children. In movies and television, we tend to only see the wealthy families distributing their assets to entitled grandchildren. It’s not often that you see the everyday parents discussing their Wills with their children.

As we work to democratize estate planning, we love hearing the generational changes with today’s parents. Open, honest conversations with your children can make the unexpected a little easier to deal with.

Did your parents talk to you about estate planning growing up? Do you plan to have these conversations with your kids?

Nikki: “My parents didn’t talk about these things with us. They just hoped for the best. I am an adult with my own child, and they still don’t have a Will. It scares me because if anything were to happen to them, we wouldn’t know what to do. And now having a daughter of my own, I want her to be aware of our plans. When my daughter’s older, we want her to have a say in it too. We want to make her aware of where she would go if something happened to both my husband and I.”

 

When my daughter’s older, we want her to have a say in [who her guardian is] too.
Nikki

Karishma: “Yes they did and we are so grateful for them to teach us this. It always lingered in our heads and we will definitely be teaching our kids about this too.”

Jessica: “No, but we will definitely be having the conversation with our kids.”

Selecting a Guardian is the primary reason parents decide to make their Will

It’s not easy to imagine anyone stepping into your parental shoes to care for your children. After all, they’re very big shoes to fill. This decision shouldn’t be made lightly and there’s a lot to factor in: the person’s values, parenting style, location, family structure, the list goes on.

It might not feel like there’s one perfect person, and that’s ok. It’s about finding the best person and discussing this responsibility with them as you make the decision.

When selecting a guardian, what qualities did you take into consideration?

Nikki: “My husband and I talked about this for hours. Location was key. And the type of parents that person is to their child. As well as their age, health, finances, and our good standing relationship with them.”

@mothermadeyou

Karishma: “If they would be able to keep both our kids together and not separate them for any which reason.”

Jessica: “Compassion, love, and care.”

Finishing your Will is like a breath of fresh air!

You know that feeling of a huge weight being lifted off your shoulders? The feeling you get when you finally clean your junk drawer or pay off your credit card bills. Finishing your Will is nothing short of that amazing feeling. The hard work is done!

And as your life naturally evolves–families grow, properties change, etc.–you have the master document completed. With Epilogue, you can update your Will at any time, free of charge.

How did you feel after you completed your Will?

Nikki: “When it was done I felt so relieved. It was almost emotional. I checked this off my list. It was such a load off my shoulders. Now I know that if anything were to happen, god forbid, that my daughter will be placed in a safe, loving home.”

Karishma: “Very happy and like a big weight was lifted off our shoulders!”

Jessica: “Relieved!”

When you write your Will, your story doesn’t end with you.

Writing your Will is about so much more than distributing assets and checking off boxes. It can be an emotional process that often means something different and personal to every individual.

Why do you Will?

Karishma: “I Will because no one knows the future or you can’t control it but what we can control is what happens after IF something were to happen. I Will because I know my kids and dog will be with exactly who we wanted them to be with.”

@lifewith2cubs

Jessica: “I Will to secure a future for my children.”

Parting words of wisdom

Karishma explains, “Making a Will is so important and it does not have to be a stressful process. The way I see it, no matter what, a process is put into motion after you die, whether you have a Will or not. But if you have a Will in place, at least your wishes are known. So make a Will and sort out your preferences.“

Making a Will is so important and it does not have to be a stressful process.
Karishma

Get to know more about these amazing mothers on Instagram:

Connect with these incredible women and follow their journies on Instagram:

Nikki: @mothermadeyou

Karishma: @lifewith2cubs

Jessica: @mother_uncomplicated

Written By Sydney Cowie